Rise of the Insane Empire | Short Story

Rise of the Insane Empire
Written by: Chris Williams

Words: 323
Genre: Comedy/Fantasy/Fairy Tale
A/N: This story was written out of pure comedy, or insanity. Depends on how one looks at it. This story is written as told to Ashvini Rajah, when we were talking over MSN. (not istant messaging, voice chat!) I told her a story so she'd fall asleep. Which she did.

Once upon a time, there was an empress who had an evil uncle who often made fun of her to the point of calling her a pumpkinhead. This empress had kinky hair and cute glasses. The empress was in love with the Emperor Insanity, who unfortunately loved an older woman who lived in a shell. The emperor wasn't about to let go of the woman, so the empress devised a plan. The empress waited one night for the older maiden to be all alone and she sent her guards to kidnap and imprison her.

The young maiden had no idea what was going on and feared for h
er life. The empress set up a time and day for her execution. Her crime: interfering with the Empress's love life. So Empress Coconut told the emperor that the woman ran away. Which broke his heart.

The empress did her best to woo the emperor and took him out to dinner, A BIG DINNER, but the way to a man's heart isn't through his stomach. It's a little further south. So, the empress did her best, her very best to get to his heart. It worked and the emperor was smitten by such a love that he whisked her away to his empire, which he called the Insane Empire and where they lived happily ever after with little Caucindians running around and a dog, an itty bitty dog.

The emperor and empress got married, and the empress got a ring in her nose to prove her love for him. She loved messing up his hair and his crazy sexual jokes.

OH! The older woman (by a few years, mind you) did escape and saw the two insanely happy. She saw Empress Coconut getting her way into Emperor Insanity's heart, and not through his stomach. So, she ran away from the empire to hide in her shell near the sea, but a typhoon hit and she drowned.